Tuesday, December 14, 2004

Word Hoard

If I could re-spell any word it would be titillating, of course I would make it tittylating because then the meaning would be inferred by the spelling and that has just a nice bounce to it.

Were I to kill one word it would be onomatopoeia and for several reasons. The first is that it doesn't represent what it means. It should be called pingalingadingdong and should be said with great zest, lusty zest with spit flying in spite of not having an s in it. Maybe pingaslingadingdong so that when you hit the s the spit can really fly.

Two other words I'd banish are vagina and penis. I'm not sure I'd replace them with any slang counterpart, though cock might be passable, nothing for vagina works in my mind, it all sounds either dropdeaddirty or too clinical. For the moment I'd go with shame1 and shame2 to be used interchangably. That's too heavy handed, isn't it. Let's change it (the penis) to... brongo--kind of masculine, yet silly at the same time. And we'll make the other (vagina) ... pralala--a mix of princess and lalalalala and for some reason I prefer this amalgam.

Some words, of course are just fine with me. Fuck is a fine, fine swear word. Cunnilingus is also very nice because it sounds like it is, and that just tickles the insides so sweetly.

Thank you and have a lovely day.