Dear Florida, remember when you fought with the south during the Civil War? That was a bad decision.

So, bad news--apparently, gorillas have no pubic hairs. The fur around their little areas is allegedly called, "fur."

My plan to make paintbrushes out of gorilla pubes has been quashed by this bad dash of bad luck.

I think an artist who had an angle of painting their stuff with the pubes of gorillas would have been a surefire win.

On the good side of the rainbow, though, it proves that Darwin was wrong. If we evolved from anything, it probly had not only back hair but also pubes. Suck it, Darwin, God wins again! Yay, Jesus!

That would be a fun cheer.

Go, go, God and Jesus! Then they do the jumping and the splits with pompoms.

Please record you doing that and send it to me and I'll make a God collage and send it to heaven.