Tuesday, July 26, 2005

Is that a screwdriver in your pocket or a ROCK HARD COCK?

If I were Dr. Who and someone came up to me and said, "Hey, nice retardis." I'd shoot back faster than a hot Timelord's butter knife through Timelord butter, "What did you say?"

He'd be all, "You heard me."

Then I'd be all, "It's go time, boooooy. It's time for some Master Ass Blaster on your ass..." And I would know that it didn't sound right because I used ass twice but I'm angry, can't you see that? I'm defending the valor of the Tardis and also retards. So much rides on this. Concentrate, Ho...CONCENTRATE!

I'd whip out the Sonic Screwdriver and then I'd stand, legs akimbo, one arm on my hip, flashing the blade of the driver out in crazy jabs and jibs with the good arm (the non claw hand arm) and he'd get the hell out of my face.

You don't fuck with a Timelord, baby. You just don't.