Wednesday, January 11, 2006

I have peed my leg for about the last time, today

Today was one of my darkest days. I face a gloom that is unbreachable by any light or wisdom or happiness and as such, I tried to kill myself.

Suicide is indeed heavy news and I hate to share it with the general public, both out of personal shame and also a deep hesitation to burden the sublime reader.

The method I chose for the attempt was of the breath holding. I held my breath for what felt like 45 or 50 seconds and I probably turned beat red.

Then I did it again, just for the thrill of the rush of death.

Then I stopped.

It's harder than you think, dying of a held breath.

Next time I'll shave my wrists with a trak 4 razor or maybe eat myself to death. Pain is just so hard, you see?