For new years tell the Japs it's a new year

Sometimes I ponder the movie Risky Business and I often think to myself that it shouldn't have been Tom Cruise who became a huge superstar, it should have been his good friend Booger.

I kinda think it's unfair of Tom to use his galactic powers to keep Booger down.

Plus if I had cosmic powers I would not make Katie Holm to by my love thrall. I'd pick Booger.

It's sad that Tom's a homo and can't show his true feelings. We're there for you, Tom. Choose Booger.