Friday, January 14, 2005

Battlestar Myasstickah

If I was an alien from another world, I'd be the slutty kind. And I'd travel only with gay aliens so they wouldn't interfere with my play.

When we landed on planets I would stoically say, "On my planet the visitee shakes the visitors probe vigorously for several minutes." Earthlings are so simple, they'd do it every time. And if they were hot, I'd say that it was a great honor to take a probe into the mouth. It is, I swear.

Probably the gay aliens would hit on me. I get that a lot. They're all, you have such strong muscles, do you work out? Then I'm all, mostly arm pumps and I give them a wink. It's flattering and all, but it can get a little tiring.