Jacking off to all trades

The fucking internet broke again, today and they called me to fix it. I'm getting so sick of that.

I first jacked into the net via the AOL paradigm quadrent one. I tested all of the ethernets for any disparity in space/time flux but that was fine. Often it's space/time turbulence which I can tune with a highly configured tuning fork.

So then I went to the subnet mask. Can you believe it was 255.0.0.0? I was all. WTF, SUBNET MASK, LOL? Are you trying to let out the entire internet?

So I patched up the subnet mask with glue and a liberal dose of vaseline. Some use KY but not me. K-Y is for amatures. I really like the bacteria that builds up in animal petroleum. It makes a man out of you.

If the internet is broken tomorrow please fix it.