Monday, March 17, 2008

Pinching you, pinching you, I am somg pinching you! (But not you, Jew--go get your own holiday and this time don't base it on Xmas, please) (and please no dradle, k? we don't care (plus it's called a top, not a dradle))

If I had to vote for a king of the United States of America, it would probably be a vote for George Bush or lasagna.  It's a tough choice of which I love more.  In fact, it's such a hard choice that you'd be cruel to make me choose between one of them.  Kinda like Sofie's Choice but deeper.  Deeper tones and long term impacts.  In fact?  Fuck you.  I won't pick.  Take that, boss man.

Since it's Monday, you need a quiz.  Sitting around all weekend sucking dick will no longer do.  You need to buck up and get serious about life.  I hope you pass the quiz, though.  If you don't, you might die today.  Or you might not.  Depends on your grade.

Multiple choice:

a.)  You should go to medical school.
b.)  You should NOT go to medical school.

The answer is a.

If you guessed b then your a retard who has to go back to retard school.

True/false:

True or false, you should NOT go to medical school.

The answer here is true.  You should not go to medical school.  If you answered true, you probably meant false, it was a badly written question and I'll throw it out.  There.  Settled.  No medical school for you. 

Oh...bad news.  I said that Spencer cheated on Heidi.  I might have been wrong there, so please don't kill him, yet (or do, it's not really that important).  The caption (I do read the captions, they're short and hold my attention) said that Spencer wronged Heidi.  I assumed cheated on but that's because I'm a man.  We cheat.  It's what we do.  God tells us to.  It's in Genesis.  Go ye forth and cheat, ye men of Sodom.  I'd cheat on her.  She has a dog's face but such boobs!

Happy Pat's day. 

Go get ye drunk.

I know I will.