Not shaving my balls, after alls

I think I just may have saved us all.  No need to kill ourselves while we wait for sudden death because I have come up with a formula that will thwart the doomsday device that CERN done.

Quick, someone get Spenser on the horn.  It's about time he done something to make up to what he done to us via Heidi Montag.

Have him get with CERN and tell them to put this in their formulaes:

e=mc^2^n where n is some quanta value of faith plus medicine plus magic, some secret constant which I will reveal here to you to be 8.

Oh, thank god I figured that out, I was getting downright morose.

Plus someone sent me the worst email ever.  Some kind of evil email.  Evail.  I wish I could forward it to you.