Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Psychotherapy, psychotherapy, psychotherapy

A lot of people wonder what I think about when I'm in the bathroom pooping...if that's where I get my good ideas because the best of my ideas have a certain bathroom quality to them.  I'll be honest with you, as romantic as that idea sounds, the creative process is not so simple as just sitting down to shit, no...when I go number two, most of the time I'm thinking about how good it feels to poop.

Know what I mean?  It feels wonderful.

Then I often think that if it feels so good coming out, how good must it feel going in?  Ya know?

Then I worry that I'm turning homosexual on account of the in-out thoughts.

Sometimes I just think about how cool it would be to actually be in real life Wolverine from the X-men--you know, have his claws and healing powers?

I like to think about how I'd do it with Jean Gray and how Cyclopes would be jealous but he would know that the cooler man staked his wife and that she really dug it (cause she does when I imagine it, she's totally all over me).

Then usually the cleaning crew comes in and knocks cause I only poop at work to economize on TP.  At that point it's a busted reverie and a rush to flush before the ladies come in with their buckets and mops to sweep away the debris.