Thursday, June 23, 2005

Upscale Ho

If Ho ran a restaurant it would be the kind of place where women would feel very comfortable to be naked while they ate. It would be a very accommodating, very nice, very open and friendly place. There would be no boob grabbing allowed… unless that was something that a person wanted.

I would call it Ho’s Walk because I would constantly be walking around and mingling with my lovely clientele…and also because there would be a lot of whores walking around. Very classy whores, too.

The wait staff would be silent and professional… like ninjas but not wearing the ninja costume. In fact there would be only one waiter, fitness celebrity John Basedow.

John Basedow would not really be a waiter so much as just there as some dude that gave blow jobs. I really can’t stand that John Basedow prick.

It would be the kind of place that was vegetarian because women really dig that kind of sensitivity. Steaks would be served in the back for the men, of course.

I’d ask the Asian community to make my restaurant sign because I think that would encourage Asians to come into my place…and we all know how much I need to fuck more Asians.

The only bad thing about Asians is they really can’t spell. Sure, they’re good at math…oh, yes…but they have a lot to learn about spelling.

Thank you, Kirlin, for the picture. And the idea. And for writing this for me.