Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Capital or capitol?

I tell my dog every day, "You have nice teats, bitch."

And she does.

Firm, rubbery teats that roll under the fingers like a pink, rubber eraser. And not just 2. She has like...8 of them. They start at the upper chest and run down by where the pee comes out. The "pee hole." That's the medical term for it.

I tell her, "One day these teats of yours are going to land you a man. Then you won't have to work. Can just sit around on the couch watching Oprah and letting the man touch the teats once or twice a month. Lucky bitch."