Guess what RIAA? I'm stealing all your nice things.

Please, someone update me on the Paris Hilton sitchy.  I've been out of the country for a couple weeks doing fund raising measures and have been out of touch.

Properly said, I have not been out of the Nebraska territories, not necessarily the country but I have been doing fund raising activities to support my agenda.

Someone, please tell me if the LA armies have raised up and freed Paris from her unfair prosecution or that the terror mobs I've been trying to hire, tell me if the terror mobs have made their blow agains the LA jail and legal system.

You see, I've been on a tour of the south and all the while I'm staying in Hilton's and hotels owned by Hilton's in order to add my small part to the Paris defense fund and to raise monies for the terror hoard mobs.

Let me tell you, it's been nice.  I mostly spent my time watching scrambled pron channels.  Can't scramble sound.  That's the key to the scrambling, a high volume and a keen imagination.

I've also been eating at the free breakfasts you get and I must admit that I ate more in free omlettes than I paid in room fees and I'm sorry about that Paris, but you know how good those free omlettes can taste when they're loaded with bacon.

And I must tell you because you don't know things, those beads really work.

Not the anals, those work but in a different way.  The boob beads.

It's like magic, you show a girl a bead and like a contract, she shows you things.

Not show so much as pelt.  Pelt a girl with a bead and the windows of the heavens peep open just a bit to reveal some sun.

I was going to say we should cut our losses on the south and let them go before this tour but after the bead incident...

I say we let the stay a little longer.