Friday, April 21, 2006

Hey there, little guy

I have just found out that Arabic is read from right to left. In light of this new discovery I have a message to deliver to my Muslim friends:

.skcuf yzarc uoy em llik t'nod esaelP

Fans of Dan Brown will realize that I have written some form of code or cryptology that is nigh undeciferable by all but the most clever superficial pulp fiction characters.

Anyway, I was thinking today that a good idea for a television drama would be the story about the man who married the midget and strapped him onto his chest like the mothers do with the babies and then snuck her into movie theaters just to save the five dollars.

Then they catch her giving him head and they're all OMG, He's molesting that baby!

And he's, no! you have it all wrong, that's my wife!

Then it really is a baby, like in those dreams where suddenly you're fucked beyond all measure of fucking or like when you're driving and you are pretty sure you hit a kid and you always go back to make sure you didn't actually hit a kid and you never really did except that one time you don't go check?

But it wasn't really a baby.

It was a midget.

Baby head is just disgusting and offensive, but not midget head. At least as long as it's not homo midget head. Hetero midget head is fun, fancy and frivolous.

Bon weekend.