Friday, February 06, 2009

Captain of Ass Zit Island

I found out today that I'm getting rich.

My Cafe Press revenues rolled in today and I don't mean to brag but soon I'll be rich and never write another thing...not that I write so much, these days, but soon the Cafe Press will be cleaning my dirty  undies and blowing on my nut sack when it's hot and humid in Omaha and the nut sack is wrinkled and wet.

I can't share the entire sum of the monies that they sent to me, probably just the first part of a much larger check (mind you), but I can say that it was a little more than seven American dollars.

I have decided to use the 7 to pad my recent venture of trying to sell a new invention to a very fickle public.  You can tell me that it might not be a good time to try and launch a series of innovative food inventions but I've always been a dreamer.

I was just in Boston pitching my newest  idea in the culinary societies and that invention is the Tamprawn.  The Tamprawn is a succulent frozen prawn surrounded by an easy to remove plastic applicator.  Simply slide off the plastic, drop the prawn onto a ceramic plate, microwave for 45-60 seconds and wala!  A meal both sanitary and fit for a king.

Sadly...no buyers. 

Thank God for the Cafe Press proceeds.

And welfare.