Monday, February 21, 2011

You have poop on your fingers and I think that's how you like it

I had to move to deacon three because the Chinese found out about the top secret award gave me for being a poppit master genius and all and getting almost every balloon popped at near light speed.  I once got down to four balloons and they were so impressed they sent me a medal via Fed Ex to space, where I live.

The Chinese are so mad and jealous.  They're gnashing their tiny hands and rolling their slitty eyes around and you can see foam on their lips and they hiss when they get like this.  I don't know how they found out about the medal, it's safe in my trunk unless you fucking told them which I'm sure now that you did.  You never did like me to have any glory and you've always wanted to be a poppit master.

I had to go to deacon four even up here in space, where I live.

You can basically tell a dog is similar and basically equal to a Mexican in most every way.  I've figured out the formulae to explain it to people, not that you fucking care.  You never were very nice to me, innerness.

For one thing, they all have brown eyes.  Like Mexicans.  I've never seen a blue eyed Mexican and that's not being racist, it's just true.  Dogs and Mexicans have brown eyes.

Another fact is they like to dig.  Dogs love to dig and get under my fence and then tear around in low riders in my neighborhood.  Well, not my neighborhood… my neighborhood is well patrolled so they stay in the south of town, which is probably best.

For 3, they are ruining the health care system.  They come up in packs and then go to our hospitals and ruin it.  It's ruinous.

Another thing is they sleep all day.  All fucking day.  When they're not clogging the hospital or digging under my fence or staring at me with devil brown hate eyes, they're sleeping on my couch where I told them not to sleep.

Mexicans are like dogs.

The end.